


Playing it Straight

by KittyGodspeed118



Category: Game Grumps
Genre: Angst, Egobang - Freeform, M/M, One-Sided Attraction
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-09-11
Updated: 2016-09-11
Packaged: 2018-08-14 12:14:01
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 934
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8013304
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KittyGodspeed118/pseuds/KittyGodspeed118
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Brian finds out that Dan and Arin have been dating secretly and all this time, he never wanted to ask Dan out because he thought he was straight.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Playing it Straight

Don’t out yourself, Brian thought. Don’t. Don’t hint. Don’t joke. Please just stay quiet. 

“I bet Dan wins first place in every beej competition,” he interjected during a particularly gay lunch conversation.

“Right?” Arin replied with enthusiasm. “He has the perfect lips for it!”

“You’re both getting massive headbutts to the chest if you keep this shit up,” Dan muttered, keeping his lips close to his cup of coffee. 

Brian found himself staring. Well, not purposely staring. Just…looking…very attentively. Dan was just beautiful and it was hard not to watch him move. Brian hated how hopelessly in love he was. He wasn’t supposed to fall this hard. He wasn’t supposed to fall at all. In fact, it angered him. He wanted to be the one person in Dan’s life who hadn’t become infatuated with him. Yet, he found himself at rock bottom by the time he could realize it was even happening. 

The only thing that saved him from sinking any lower was knowing that Danny was straight. Brian’s logic was: if he’s straight, then he can’t help it any. At least I can’t get jealous this way. Everything is fine. 

“Well, fine, I’ll leave it here for now,” Dan laughed, standing up. “I gotta go to the bathroom. Don’t…do…weird shit while I’m gone.”

“Don’t tell me what to do,” Arin chuckled, grabbing hold of Dan’s hand as he began to walk away.

Purely by instinct, Dan leaned down and left a quick peck on Arin’s lips. He pulled back quickly, covering his face as if to hide either the intense blush or his lips that had dared to act faster than his brain. Arin smirked, seemingly unaffected by the embarrassment that Dan was so clearly feeling an abundance of. 

“Oh,” Brian said simply. 

Did he sound hurt? He couldn’t tell. His tone felt flat as it left his mouth, but maybe it was bitter. His brain rushed to send a signal to his lips, trying to make things any less awkward.   
“This is a thing.” He followed up, sounding twice as affected despite how hard he tried to sound happy or surprised.

It wasn’t surprising that Dan would choose Arin. It was fascinating to Brian that his own brain went from doubting Dan could ever be less than straight to thinking about how much sense it made for him to be with Arin. The Tumblr fandom made its case for why they belonged together. Hell, everybody seemed to be pushing for it. It made sense.

“We…didn’t wanna make things awkward for everybody,” Dan explained quietly, holding Arin’s hand a bit tighter. “You understand, don’t you?”

Brian was still deep in thought. His stomach twisted up into a giant knot and the butterflies he got whenever Dan spoke to him tried their best to flutter around it. His eyes were cast down at his pale hands as he tried to think. Anything would be better than the disgusting self-loathing feelings he felt now. He felt a gross mixture of envy, anger, heartbreak, and a burning desire to change the way things had just played out. 

“I know it’ll be a little weird at first,” Arin started, trying his hand at getting through to Brian, who had yet to say anything. “But neither of us want this to affect our friendships.”

“Yeah, you’re a great friend, Bri,” Dan followed up, reaching out to touch Brian’s shoulder.

“I understand completely,” Brian said simply, getting up from his chair. 

He didn’t want to say anything. Anything that left his lips would’ve come back to bite him anyhow. There was no way to say “I’ve been madly in love with you since Day 1″ without shattering everything he’d built for himself. There was no way to say “I can be right for you even with my graying hair and creaking bones” without hurting himself. So, he stood there. His eyes closed.  
Blink. Blink.

He hadn’t even felt his feet carry him to the bathroom where he stared into the mirror. It wasn’t supposed to hurt like this. He hadn’t felt something this visceral since being broken up with in high school. Even then, it didn’t feel so painfully twisted as it did now. 

“Bri, are you okay,” Dan asked, his voice quiet and calming as he opened the door. “A-are you…crying?”

Brian swore he’d never let anyone see him cry. This was precisely why. He already felt pathetic for falling in love with someone as sought after as Dan. Still, he felt words leave his lips before he could make himself stop thinking them.

“I’m so fucking into you,” Brian mumbled, the words just barely passing his lips as he spoke. 

“But…I thought-”

“Yeah, it’s been a deep closet.”

“Bri-”

“You and Arin were made for each other. I don’t believe in that bullshit, but you two clearly deserve each other.”

And Dan didn’t know how to feel either. Part of him wondered if he’d have taken Brian up on dating if he knew that he wasn’t straight. The other part felt like he’d betrayed Brian for staying closeted for so long. All of his body ached.

“I’m sorry,” Dan finally said. “I’m just really…maybe if things were different-”

“But they’re not. It’s probably better this way…I mean…he makes you happy.”

“But so do you-”

“Let’s just pretend this didn’t happen.”

“Ah…hey.”

“Yeah?”

“I won’t tell anyone about this if you don’t.”

Brian might’ve smiled. He tried to. The gesture was nice. Dan was nice. If his heart wasn’t breaking, he would’ve reached out and hugged him.


End file.
